I Don’t Know You But I Love You

I don't know you, but I love you. 

I know that sounds strange, right? At first, I thought so too, and I just kept wondering, why does this phrase keep repeating itself in my mind? What am I supposed to do with it? Do I just keep it to myself, or do I share it with everyone? 

I said Victoria, that's kind of weird. Definitely don't tell anyone that. And I understand, because love is usually something we think of as personal, deeply personal, something that's built over time through relationships and history. But no matter how much I try to brush it aside, my inner voice just kept whispering to me, say it, share it. 

So here I am saying it to you. I don't know you, but I love you. 

Now, you might be wondering, is that even possible? How can you love someone you don't know, and how can love exist without knowing the details of someone's life? And how can you love without reason? 

So many of us are taught from a young age, whether we realize it or not, that love comes with reasons, and that it has to be earned by proving our worth. But love is so much more than that.  The truth is that love is deeply human. It's not limited or something we have to guard or something that's scarce in our lives, it's something that we can feel for one another, just as humans going through this beautiful, crazy thing called life together. We all have that in common together and when we see and understand love this way, we understand that it's something we can give freely through kindness, patience, looking out for one another in so many different ways. 

I was actually reminded of this the other day I was out walking my dog, Mei Mei. Mei Mei is this small Welsh Terrier, and she has a lot of spunky attitude. She's small, but in her mind, she's a big dog, and it's her world, and we're all just living in it. And so we were crossing the street, Mei Mei and I, when I noticed a man standing on the corner. He was wearing a tattered coat and holding a sign asking for support from everyone that walked by, and he looked as if he had been standing there all day with people just hurrying past him. And so I picked Mei Mei up to keep her from jumping on people who are waiting across the street, because she's always jumping on people. And as I picked her up, I noticed him watching me, and there was something in his expression, maybe it looked hurt. And so for a split second, I wondered, does he think I'm pulling Mei Mei away from him. So I looked up and our eyes met, and I decided in that moment to smile at him, and he smiled back. And in that moment, something happened between us. It was that we saw each other. I could see myself in his eyes, and I felt and sensed that he saw himself in me. And that moment was so beautiful to me, and it meant so much. And just for that moment, it didn't matter what our circumstances were, what our differences were, where we were going, what was going on in our lives. 

We were just two humans sharing a moment of very deep recognition, and that's what love is. It's as simple as just really, truly seeing another person, seeing them as they are. 

Love isn't just a feeling, it's something we do. It's a practice, a choice. Love is how we build a world where people feel seen, valued and cared for, and it's the most powerful force. It binds us together. It weaves a thread between us, reminding us that we're not alone, and right now, especially, love is very important because the world feels very heavy with fear. 

Fear is something that divides. It isolates and it makes us believe we're separate from one another, and when we forget our connection as humans, we become easier to control, because a divided world is a vulnerable one. But the moment we remember is the moment we reclaim our power. 

Love reminds us of the truth that we belong to each other. 

And this is the kind of love that unites, that sees, that holds space for one another, that trusts, that respects, that is patient and kind. This kind of love is already inside us. It's already inside us because it's our very nature. It's our very essence. So when we love, we are actually tapping into something deep, something that goes beyond thinking and beyond reasoning itself. Love is a natural kind of intelligence. It's one of the greatest we have access to. It's one that's always there and always available to us. 

For example, think of someone you love right now, someone you really deeply love–if they were in trouble or needed encouragement or advice from you, or if they were struggling with something, what would you say to them to encourage them or to support them? What would you do to help them? 

Notice in this moment right now, how the answer may naturally emerge inside you, what you would do or say to help them or support them. This is because love holds a wisdom of its own. There's a guiding force to it. There's just something you know inside yourself when it comes to love, true love, and that's what's so amazing about love. 

To love is to make contact with your very nature. 

It's your essence. As a human, you have this incredible ability to be a living expression of love in the world. I would argue that love is not just an emotion, it's actually our highest calling. 

It reminds me of something Archbishop Desmond Tutu spoke about this concept of Ubuntu. It's a spiritual teaching from African cultures. That means I am because we are. In other words, I am who I am because we are who we are. Ubuntu teaches us that our humanity is bound together, that we don't exist in isolation, and that we become who we are through our relationships with others. I can only truly know myself by knowing you. So we are all a part of something larger or greater, whole, and we need each other to know ourselves. 

But somewhere along the way, we've all forgotten what it means to be in community. We've forgotten what community is. Community is something that's actually disappearing from our lives. And in the world today, there's a forgetting when we look around the world of what community is. It's fading in the world around us, but community is really important because it's how we express and know love. 

And so that's why I can say, I don't know you, but I love you. I love you for everything you are, for everything you've been through, for all the times you've struggled, even with all the mistakes you've made. I love you. I love you for all the strength you have, even when you don't feel strong, for all the softness you've somehow managed to hold on to, for all the love you have inside you, even when the world tries to make you hard or take it away, for all the quiet battles you fight every day, the ones no one else sees but you know you're carrying and fighting, and for all the beauty you bring into the world just for being you.

And the details of our lives might not match, but underneath it all, you and I, we're one and the same, and when you move through this understanding everything shifts, you'll see that there are no strangers, and you're never alone. You'll never feel alone, because everywhere you go, you just end up seeing yourself. 

In this spirit, I offer you this in the words of Ram Das Namaste, I honor the place in you in which the entire universe resides. I honor the place in you of light, of love, of peace. I honor the place within you where, if you are in that place, and I am in that place, there is only one of us. 

This week, I invite you to take a moment to truly see someone, to recognize that same light and that same humanness reflected back at you, because when you see them, you're also seeing yourself. Pause notice and try to really see if you can see yourself in another person. And just like I listened to my own inner voice today, by sharing this message with you this week, I invite you also to join me and do something small or big that your inner voice is calling you to do. Just see where it leads you as an experiment, because so often, when we listen to our intuition, especially in the face of fear, it leads to something beautiful. It deepens our connections and opens doors we never expected. It leads us exactly where we're meant to be. 

Let me leave you with a blessing. May you see yourself in others and know you are never alone, and may you know that love is always with you, guiding you, surrounding you. 

Listen to the full episode of the Inner Calling podcast “ESSENTIALS: I Don’t Know You But I Love You” to learn more about this here, & get the workbook to go along with it in our Resource Library!